Archive for October, 2008

October 28, 2008

Two all beef patties, special sauce…

by Kyle Smith

Well thankfully in exactly a week all of this political garbage will be coming to a close, at least one would hope. During this campaign I’ve heard a ton of great things come out of the two stooges running for office but I’m worried none of it will ever happen. Some one sent me a joke about a guy choosing between heaven and hell and he went to hell and played golf, hung out with his friends, and just did everything he would love to do everyday. So when he went back to the pearly gates he told them he’d rather go to hell. Upon arrival back to hell, the place was hot, dry, full of trash and everyone was so miserable. He asked what happened to the place he just left and the devil simply responded, “We were campaigning last time you were here.”

I think that’s what is going to happen to America after this election. And in fact, this election reminds me of when I ran for student council president in the 5th grade. At my elementary, student council prez was the top of the top. If you were prez, you were officially the coolest most popular kid around. So naturally, I had to be the prez!

We campaigned for a week and then at the close of the week we would stand in front of the entire school and give our speech as to why we should be president. Before I get started, I should tell you that by now I had been involved with local politics for about three years. And though I was only in the 5th grade, I knew politicians just said what they needed to say to get elected.

So I waited to give my speech as one of my opponents was giving his speech. “Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun. I understand that in order for something to be great you need all the parts. A big mac wouldn’t be the same without the sauce, and as president I know that our school wouldn’t be the same without all of you…” (this really was his speech, no lie). He concluded and then it was time for the big dog to step up and give the speech.

Just so you know, I was actually peeing my pants when I was giving my speech. I hated talking in front of large crowds but I knew my platform was way better than the other candidates. And as my discipline records showed, I knew how to entertain a crowd and talk, talk, talk.(My speech might not have gone exactly like this, but it was pretty darn close)

Ahem…”Good morning. My name is Kyle Smith and I’m running for president. As president I think that things should be changed and we should all be more equal. One of the first things I will do is allow students to give teachers conduct marks. If they’re allowed to give us conduct marks, it’s only fair for us to do the same. I also think that if they’re allowed to have coke machines in the teachers lounge then we should get them in the cafeteria. So after I give us the right to give teachers conduct marks, I will add coke machines in the cafeteria, and along with the coke machines I will add candy bar machines. I know what it’s like to be a student, and as president I will make sure school is more fun. We’ll have recess all day and only have a 20 minute break for classes…”

I’m sure I made plenty more empty promises, but the point is I got elected. By a lot. And what was even better is that as I was giving my speech I knew good and well that none of the things I was saying would ever happen. And a part of me knows that the students who voted for me knew nothing would really happen but boy it sounded good!

So the moral of the story is:
Smooth talkin’ and empty promises can get you elected.

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October 24, 2008

In case you didn’t know….

by Kyle Smith

And by the way….should someone be looking into this?
“Mark my words,” Biden had said. “It will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy. The world is looking.”

It sounds like Biden knows something that others don’t and Biden would be the one to know what’s going on in the international circuit. So shouldn’t we be preparing to stop whatever Biden is referring to from happening? Just sayin….

October 23, 2008

Comics and face lifts…

by Kyle Smith

I gave my photography site a face lift, check it out if ya want to kylesmithphotography.com.
And here’s a political comic for your enjoyment…

October 21, 2008

Fun with paper…

by Kyle Smith

To explain why he has the shiny tissue paper in his pants, when Nicole first opened her gift she put the paper in his shorts and he chased it around like a dog chases it’s tail. We tried to recreate it but he learned from his past…

October 21, 2008

Hi I’m Barack and I’m John…

by Kyle Smith

The latest Mac ad kinda reminds me of the presidential race. B.O. has been setting fund raising records left and right, and is shoveling tons of money into political ads. What if he took all the fund raising efforts and told the American people what he’s really going to do as president.

October 20, 2008

Just say no…

by Kyle Smith

Here’s Jackson doing his latest discovery…

October 20, 2008

When will it stop?

by Kyle Smith

I’m not going to say a thing, just watch…

Although I will say that whoever was singing needs to not quit their day job…

Basil over at IMAO put it best:
“But don’t question Obama’s patriotism, we’re told.
So, I won’t.
But, if you’re voting for Barack Obama, I’m questioning yours.”

October 18, 2008

John McCain at his best…

by Kyle Smith
October 17, 2008

Advanced Photo Resizing

by Kyle Smith

This is some pretty crazy stuff. This technology could change the photography industry as we know it:

October 17, 2008

Joe the Plumber

by Kyle Smith

*UPDATE: B.O.’s camp is quickly trying to wiggle it’s way out of this. They’re saying that Joe was a set-up by McCain. SO? Set-up or not, B.O. still gave a Socialist answer. Secondly, OBiden is saying he doesn’t know of any plumber who makes $250k, DUH! Because the whole thing in question is the fact that if Joe BUYS the company then he’ll be in the higher tax bracket. What an idiot. Just listen!*

Well the presidential debates are finally over, pfew. I thought they’d never end. If you’ve seen any of the candidate’s political ads you would quickly discover the debates are just re-runs of the ads. Until last night when Joe the Plumber was introduced.

I think it was a good idea for the candidates to break away from the tax mumbo jumbo or the health care speak that we all expect. With Joe in the picture it helped American’s realize what it all will means in context. Though I think McCain didn’t really do that great of a job, I think this is finally where he might have gained some ground.

On B.O.’s plan, American’s will have absolutely no incentive to make more money. Although he swaggered back and forth, like he does on many issues, between $200 and $250 thousand, he still let America know that if he’s president then you better not be too successful. And when John McCain said, “Why would you want to raise taxes for anybody.” I really hope America heard that. This whole Robin Hood plan is all well and good, just look how great it worked in Texas. I’m certainly not saying that we should just forget about all those in America who truly need help, but what I am saying is that Socialism isn’t the answer. I don’t know why McCain just won’t buck up and flat out say that B.O.’s plan is out right Socialism. In fact, B.O. has out right said that he wants to “Spread the Wealth”.

Here’s a video of Joe’s and B.O. entire convo. I’ve gotta be honest, it brings up some scary truths about B.O. Take a few minutes and watch Joe and B.O.’s convo:

One of B.O.’s first points is that on his plan Joe would have been able to save money over the past 15 years b/c of his proposed tax cuts and would have been able to get to the point of buying his business quicker. Well very nicely put B.O., BUT what you forgot to leave out is that he would have gotten to your higher tax increase quicker too. But that’s really not the main issue with me.

In the video if you start paying attention around the 3 minute mark, B.O. flat out says to “Spread the wealth!!!!!!!!!!!” Now if that’s not the most Socialist comment I don’t know what would be! Now if you didn’t click on the Socialism link before, then do it now and read aloud the third sentence that begins with Karl Marx. And actually for my lazy readers I’ll just copy/paste it right here for you, see how nice I am?

Socialism refers to a broad set of economic theories of social organization advocating social or collective ownership and administration of the means of production and distribution of goods, and the creation of an egalitarian society.[1][2] Modern socialism originated in the late nineteenth-century working class political movement. Karl Marx posited that socialism would be achieved via class struggle and a proletarian revolution which represents the transitional stage between capitalism and communism.[3][4]

Scary huh? Now I agree with B.O. on several things, BUT the Socialism thing is just too much for me.

McCain | Palin ’08 is the better choice for America.